this is how you love yourself. say the hard things.

While on the train, use the notebook. Tell your stories. Speak the truth. Speak your truth, out loud.

I didn't want to come here because I don't want to think about these things in a concentrated setting for an hour.

Laugh because you know that statement is crap. It's partly true and partly false and nagging at you, always. That's life.   
 
I am tired of thinking about these things, this person, this problem, this fear. I am tired of feeling this way all.the.damn.time.

Then stop. Make a different choice.

Everything we do is a choice. It took a lot of therapy for me to accept and understand this. A lot of time in a dark green leather chair and then a lot of time on a dark brown leather couch in a different man's office.

You can choose to follow a thought or acknowledge it and say, "Not today, not tomorrow either. Go away."

The truth needs to be told. It needs to be shared. It's the only way it becomes less heavy. We're all carrying too much. Learning to travel this world lightly is an absolute game changer. Not everything needs to be held with clenched fists. There is zero shame in asking for help, zero shame and 1,000% humanity. The shame is what weighs us down, what keeps us from talking about it, whatever your it is. We can't grow without going through the hard stuff first, without saying the hard things.

I didn't want to come here because I don't want to think about these things in a concentrated setting for an hour. 

So I took two weeks off. I told myself, I need to sit and not run from place to place to talk about this crap for an hour. (This is exactly what I need. The talking part, not the running around part).

I went back. And it felt as good as I knew it would be. The things we resist the most only get bigger and heavier if we don't talk about them. Talking heals. It's scary as hell, but it heals. Our fears lose their power when we face them. And talk about them in concentrated settings for an hour. 

When we take a step and another, this is where growth and change happen. Lighten your load. Say the words to anyone who will listen, truly listen. Listen to yourself. This is how you love yourself.