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December 19, 2012

what i know at 28.

at 3:05 this afternoon i will turn twenty-eight.

twenty-seven has been quite good, in so many ways. but i'm really excited about twenty-eight. i feel hope like i've never felt before. plus, i love even numbers.

in no particular order, these are things i know in my bones to be true. things i've come back to over and over again this past year.

happiness is a choice. 

certain things are worth the extra money: food is the first that comes to mind. eyelash curlers are another. others don't need to be expensive to be good, things like sunglasses and flowers. 


loving and forgiving are the hardest things in the world, but they're the most rewarding.


comparing anything about you to anything about someone else is the fastest way to exhaust yourself.


my body hatred is the most boring thing about me, but i'm grateful that it's brought about quite a bit of good.


if someone doesn't take something as seriously as you it has nothing to do with you. you can't make someone care.

sometimes the high road is the last place i want to be. 


worrying causes wrinkles. and migraines. and acne. and weight gain. 

talking is a form of healing, so is crying. 

there is nothing wrong with crying on the bus as long as it happens sporadically, you're wearing sunglasses (if possible,) and you know the reason why.  


be the person who asks why? 

ruffle the world's feathers. ruffle your own.

say yes. a lot.

consider yourself lucky if you have a friend who calls you peach. there's something beautiful about the love in that little word.

choosing to do nothing is not dealing with things. this is different from letting go. we all know the difference.


the sound of someone i love calling me rhi is one of my favorite things in the whole world.

find something that feeds your soul. it cannot involve food.

karma is real.


it's possible to somehow feel equal parts angry, sad, and indifferent.

angry, sad, and indifferent is a bad place to be. 

admitting you need therapy is hard. getting there on your own is harder. finding a green chair in the office of a former chicago cop is a blessing. 


needing therapy does not make you weak. 

talk to strangers. to this day some of my best friends are people i randomly started talking to. 

have friends of all ages. this will come in handy more than you could ever anticipate. 

falling in love is worth the wait. it took me over twenty years to love myself. and then i met ben. i wouldn't have it any other way.

food is not your enemy.

maybe and should are dangerous words. use them wisely. 

people will try to silence you everyday in small, quiet ways. pay better attention. stop allowing this.

thank you is its own prayer. it's enough. 


i finally get what anne lamott has been getting at. hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come. you wait and watch and work: you don't give up. 

this is my prayer for twenty-eight. i'm ready. 

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